I would just like to thank all the people who made the VMAs possible. Thank you for making me lose/waste two hours of my life; I will never be able to get those precious moments back. And to think, I gave up a Simpson rerun for that monstrosity!
I know, I should have just changed the channel, but I just couldn't. The VMAs were like a bad traffic accident; you know you should look away or divert your attention elsewhere, but something just has you fixated on the accident. Well in this case; the mess.
Was comedian Sarah Silverman the host? Or was she supposed to be providing entertainment? Either way I wasn't in the mood to hear the comedic-styling of Amy Winehouse's twin. {{Hint: that's not a compliment Sarah}} What's the appeal with her? A chimp would have been more entertaining.
The show looked as though it was put together by a muppet. What was with all the bootleg looking performances? Why have that huge stage, if you weren't going to have people actually perform on it? Simulcasting from other areas is for Dick Clarke's New Year's Rocking Eve, not for award shows. The best performance of the night was by R&B Chris Brown. Usher is going to have to work his tail off to make a come-back and compete against this little enchilada! Chris definitely has the potential to be one of the biggest names in the industry. Brown has the voice, moves and the good-looks; triple threats are always a hot commodity!
His performance was good, but I could have done without seeing and hearing Rihanna. Rihanna sweetheart, please, please stop the music. Am I the only one who was hoping that she'd take a tumble down those stairs like her rival Beyonce? C'mon you guys know that would have been hilarious. One positive things about Rihanna, was her appearance, I must admit that she did look very elegant in her dress; now all she needs to do is get a bangs and she's set!
Where do I begin with Britney? Britney Spears' long awaited comeback was a complete dud! Her new track "Gimme More", is definitely a hot single, it's been playing all over the radio, but the performance; not so much. Not only did the performance look like her second rehearsal, but she looked like she didn't want to be there. Her lip-syncing was off and she barely even moved around the stage. I don't know if it was nerves or some kind of medication; either way I have never seen such a lazy performance in my life. Her back-up dancers outshined her in every way! Also, I know you've had two kids Britney, but your mid-section doesn't look like what it use to be; you should definitely fire your fashion consultant. I would have given my right leg to see her tracks slip out of her hair; that way, at least my two hours wouldn't have been in vain.
Who "loved" the appearance by Lauren Caitlin Upton, Miss Teen South Carolina contestant? I get it, all I have to do is knock a few brain cells out of my head and I'll be able to get on television. Uncanny! Why on earth would this child even agree to go on television again? And what's worse is that she herself mentioned that she was famous not because of being a contestant, but because of that infamous youtube clip of her "answering" a question from the pageant. I use to believe our children were the future, but after witnessing this girl crash and burn, I'm not so sure.
When will people stop acting ghetto? Ghetto behavior may have been cute when you were in high school, but not when you're thirty years- old. If you are yelling and screaming into the camera, how do you expect the viewers and the audience to hear you? Not only is it juvenile, but it's rude and completely unprofessional. No one wants to listen to that; that kind of behavior is ok for your living room and in the street, but not on national television.
What was the point in 50 Cent and Kanye stopping and having a stare down? Were we supposed to get chills? The only chill I got was from my freezer when I went to go get some ice for my drink. Then poor 50 Cent couldn't get a word in edgewise; it's not like anyone really wanted to hear him talk, but why not share the spotlight a little Kanye?
Am I the only one who thought Jaime Foxx was high? What was with the lack of focus? I know not everyone reads off of the teleprompter and there's nothing wrong with that; that's showbiz. However, Jaime went off on a tangent and it seemed like he had been popping some blue and yellow purple pills. Poor Jennifer Garner had no clue what was going on- no worries Jennifer, neither did we. I can agree with Jaime on one point; Jennifer's dress was fabulous. Sadly, I can't say the same for Beyonce's dress. Beyonce sweetheart, save the drapes for your bedroom curtains and not for award shows.
Speaking of appearances, Alicia Keys decided to turn herself into a life-size award. Maybe she was making up for not being nominated this year, but what was with all the bronzer? It would be different if the bronzer was blended in, but it looked as though she-or whoever did it- just threw it on and walked out the door. I expected so much better Ms. Keys. I will confess that her performance was one of the best ones of the night. Alicia is a great artist and it's great to see her back on the scene, I just wish that it was a different scene that she was appearing on.
Timberlake and Miss Umbrella eh eh eh were the big winners of the night. However, I think the shocker of the night was when they announced that Fergie was the winner of Best Female Artist of the Year. Fergie beat out the likes of Rihanna, Beyonce and Nelly Furtado. Did someone switch the envelopes? Did someone forget how to read? I refuse to believe that Fergie could be bestowed with that award. Then again why should I be surprised especially since mediocre singing seems to be the new fad in the industry.
All in all, if you had nothing better to do this past Sunday, then I am sure you got your fill with this show. However, if you're like me and you love music and awards shows, then you were highly disappointed. I would much rather watch Tay Zonday's rendition of "Chocolate Rain" one-hundred times instead of watching the VMAs again.
